Friday, February 29, 2008

I am saying sorry

I'm saying sorry first
I'm saying sorry last
I'm saying sorry for the future
but mainly for the past

I'm sorry that I wasn't there for you
and I'm sorry for not listening when you needed it the most
you were right
and you had the right to be mad

I'm sorry that you felt the need to apologize
and I'm sorry that you were hurt
I'm sorry that I can only see the good
and always try to avoid the bad

I'm saying sorry for all my mistakes
I'm saying sorry for being blinded
blinded by the perfect thought of you and me
when really we don’t have a chance

I'm the stupid one
I let you down
and I feel it deep within me

We both made some errors
and said something wrong
but that’s how life is
Nobody's perfect not even me and you
so I'm sorry for that too
And I'm sorry for everything but ...
Please forgive me We can change things back to normal
I'm sorry if this is not what you want
But it’s the only thing I can think of

To my unborn child

I write from here on from the truth in my heart and the depths of my soul, to you a blessing that was bestowed upon me.
You came into me, a new life, so true and complete.
I never dreamt it would be this way,
How could I have been chosen to bear such wonder?
A blessing beyond imagination, could I ever ask for more?
You came to me in my dreams and you my little angel so small and sweet, the most beautiful thing I have ever seen, a smile so radiant and eyes so deep I saw your father right through you.
My precious child as I drift and wonder what it would be like to meet you for the first time, your tiny hands so small and soft and delicate like an orchid in may.
You are my angel, my heart, my baby…. God gave you to me to love and care for until you left and that so I did and even when you left I never stopped loving you so that when you come again you will be a living proof of the love your father and I shared.
Sweet child I pray god bless you with your fathers eyes to see the world with all things wise,
I pray you inherit my ability to plan for what is far away but yet close, so you will be prepared for the things in life whether man or woman.
I pray you receive you father’s centre and be cautious in every door you enter with my spirit that you will let no one take from you and my curiosity, just like me to blurt a bundle of questions.
Have my big heart and your father’s discernment so you know when to let go before getting hurt.
Share the strength of your father to handle what you feel, and share my sense of humor and laugh alot it helps in life and still have your father’s duty to know when to be serious.
I am emotional so it’s ok to cry sometime but always remember your father and I will always be here to dry your tears.

Until you return my child I pray everyday as you play among the clouds you will be protected by our love and be blessed with all that your father and I have given unto you.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Tu amor

through the rain you cannot see my tears..you cannot see them but baby i am willing to go to the ends of the earth to be with you no matter what happens i will always love you..even when death is upon us my heart will still long for you..i have never found love on a level so high and we both have it so strong i hate to loose it...you have changed me..to someone i dont even reconise my self...this girl is so amazing..your name is written across my heart with your love.. tu amor

I am watching you

On a big white cloud i sit looking down at you...laughing at how you try to climb up cannot reach i spread my wings and roam about then pick you up...and take you with me higher than the clouds..touching the stars and waving to the moon....as we pass we leave a faint stain across the sky our love reginin over the earth ...and i put u back where u were and again sit upon the clouds and watch you decide to scale the clouds or use the stairs?

WHERE IS MY HEART

The faint beat of my heart is about to go and the soft breath left in me goes and i cease to survive my wilterin rose will die for the petals are falling and no one is picking them up?

Sunday, February 24, 2008

He awaits my arrival

taking baby steps, i climb up a mountain of feelings i hav for you, taking each into consideration, embracing every moment of thought i colide with, realizing how much every second counts....reaching the top, i await your arrival with open arms and a heart, one beat extra just for you...in my mind you stay like a plague, theres nothin i can do but accept that fact im falling for you. Would i ever get this feeling back in return...i stay awaitin your arrival...if needs be on top of that mountain waitin for eternity just to share that special moment with you

Where do you go from here? What do you? What is your choice?

This article today is one of my deepest ever, i had to read over the others to make sure my nerve's can let me express what i am feeling. Well here it is....

There you are, going through your daily routine,
along comes someone you don't really notice but yet they are there. You share laughs and exchange views, thoughts and whatever possible. Doing all of this you had no idea that somewhere down the line you will fall in love with this person. At first everything is neutral but as time goes by you seem to draw more towards them.
Everything goes well after the Cinderella story and you are the happiest couple ever. Arguments become tiny things you breeze through them like ABC'S, then all of a sudden when it seems as if your life could not be more perfect the worst thing happens. You find faults with your significant other and then you just want to put them out. Clear them out of you life, attempt to avoid hurting them but even though you are very careful you mange to break them like a valuable crystal. Everything else in your world is at the top but you cannot seem to climb up and be there with them you want to stay at the bottom with your heart and try to find crazy glue and put it back together as quick as possible. Adding crazy glue only made it worst you added pieces that were never even there. This only makes matters worst you begin to build a wall that in the long run you are going to have to climb to get up to your mountain. Words become swords and each one pierce you so deep you drain almost to death. The love that was created with your other is stronger than your walls and bigger than your mountain but you cannot seem to tap into it long enough to over your mountain and break down your wall. But what you both fail to realise is that none of you can over come the obstacle in your way unless you do it together. And my question Where do you go from here? Well my personal answer is team up and face each others trials together, be there for each other and even when you both cannot see the clear picture of how just try and you will see the smoke clear away. This also answered question two what to do? Be their, be a shoulder, give an ear, even if you are far apart keep a solid communication and you will be amazed what will happen. Now i am asking my third question what is your choice? Well my choice is to try and see what happens after i try question one and two. Until then i am done..



love is laughter
love is tears
love is sleeping on the couch
love is respect
love waking up and wishing for a good morning
and before you know it you smile because there it is,
love is waiting all day by the phone,
even though you know they wont call,

its an obsession,
a poem
a Corny rhyme just to make you smile
its the things you want it to be
and i want my love to be just what it wants
i want to give love as wide as the ocean and never ending like of the blue in the sky
but i also want to receive love no exactly as how i give but how they would like to get it

Baby i know i piss you off so many times n act a fool but when i fool can find true love it make him wiser than a rich bachelor